Conviction of the Spirit Vs The Conviction of Legalistic Leaders Who Think You Suck

As long as the title is, it exposes the lie told to too many congregants regarding the Holy Spirit and His convictions.  John 16....Check it out.

Young's Literal Version:  "But I tell you the Truth; it is better that I go away, for if I don't go away the comforter will not come unto you, and if I go on, I will send Him unto you. 

Concerning Sin, because they do not believe in me.

Concerning Righteousness, because unto my Father I go away, and no more do ye behold me

Concerning Judgement, because the ruler of this world hath been judged."  (V. 7-11)

I'm going to tell a very personal account of my life as an early Christian.  When God told me what I was to become through a very well respected Pastor, I was kneeling in worship.  I felt his hands on my back and he whispered in my ear, "Grant, I don't know when or where, but you are going to become a Youth Pastor."  Not exactly what I expected at that time, as I was a very 'unpopular' teenager among other teenagers.  Yet I was excited.  So I began to live it out in an enthusiastic way.  Youth Trips, youth meetings, Youth conferences, youth this, youth that....it became something I absolutely loved volunteering toward even to this day.  (FACT: Anybody who knows me well also knows I'm a teenager trapped in a 28 year old's body.  Youth Ministry fits very well.)

Early in my faith, however, there was this hinderance holding me back from my full potential as a leader of any congregation.  During this season of my life I had very little, to no confidence in myself.  I wanted to be cool, though.  So I would listen to the advice and opinions of anybody and believe in it.  This is called NAIVE.  So many people in this world are seeking something greater then themselves.  They need to be shown the love of a God that will never leave us or forsake us.  However, there is always a bad seed in every apple.  That seed sucks the life out of enthusiastic, young, fresh Christians as I was in those days.  They lie and scheme into the hungry hearts of people looking for answers and validation.  Here are a few of the several lies that cursed the very essence of my calling as a Youth Pastor:

"Grant, you need to focus on His will for you life.  Not your own."

"Grant, God can't accomplish anything in you as long as you're still living a life of sin."

"Grant, I'm not sure what you're called to do, but you're not going to be a Youth Pastor so stop trying so hard.  I hope you trust me that I say this out of love....."

These leaders were throwing false, behavior modifying doctrine that was based on the control and manipulation of my heart, my mind, and my soul.  How could I follow Jesus' command to love Him with all of those things when they were being distracted with this life-limiting crap?  Legalistic ideologies seem so sweet, so welcoming, but it made me sick to the core for a really long time.  If a 'Pastor' is saying something, it must be true....right?  Wrong.  Through maturity, the Holy Spirit, and a lot of study in prayer, I found that these curses were nothing more then a stronghold in my life.  I've put them behind me.

Before I go on any further I have to clear something up.  The spirit of this writing might carry a sense of resentment or hurt feelings from all of this.  On the contrary, I have fully forgiven those who have doubted me, judged me, or questioned my ability as a leader in any sense of the word.   I admit that I use to be bitter and hurt because they are what they are: life limiting curses.  Words tear down even if it's in the best of intentions.  I use strong words like 'crap' because it's a fun word to use.  I have a lot of respect and love for anyone who declares Christ as Lord, and these things said to me weren't meant to tear me down, but build me up.  Their intentions were right, so I definitely hold nothing against them.  I have something against the religion that binds them from freedom.

  I've never imagined myself as alone in this world especially in my search for validation.  I can only imagine the millions of other people out there that may have even left the church because they never felt 'good enough' to do what God called them to do.  Instead, I'm included in a large group of people that felt as if they were held under a huge microscope of being encouraged to live 'above reproach' (Another verse in the Bible twisted to fit the needs of legalistic parasites.)  Haunting images of "God is watching" flash through our minds, and then comes the self-doubt.  We can't be leaders because of the 'leaders' that condemn us.  I've been convicted by the Polo shirt and kahakis that I won't amount to their leadership skills.  I would never be as good, or righteous as them.  I've been convicted by legalistic standards, and feeling like I'd never 'add up'.  A lot of good Chrisitan men would never say it to my face, or even realize they believed it...but.."You're not good enough" is the same as....You suck.  Even the cliche saying, "God isn't saying no, He's saying 'not yet'" builds a sense of control between Church leader, and naive church follower.  Let us stand up and refuse to allow church leaders to use scripture to manipulate our behavior, dreams, and goals to serve GOD!  It's crap.

Then I grew up, and God gave me a reality.  Ready for a little bit of radical truth?

The Holy Spirit does NOT convict believers of sin or our inabilities to SERVE HIM, and He definitely doesn't think we suck.  John 16, when Jesus describes the conviction of the comforter, He breaks it down into three ways.  Non-Believers, Believers, and judgement.  Non-believers will be convicted of their disbelief.  Believers will be convicted of the righteousness inside of them for the Holy Spirit is in us, and the the Spirit will convict us of judgement, as Jesus was judged first. Did you hear that?  We, as believers, are convicted of righteousness.  It's not about about you can or can't do.  It's about who you are.  

As a true believer you died with Christ.  The old is gone, the new has come, and the Spirit of Christ literally lives inside of you.  To tell you that you aren't 'good enough' is telling Christ He isn't good enough to work through you.  I've allowed leaders whom I trusted wholeheartedly to slow me down.  I've allowed my heart to fall for the hyprocrisy of congretional leaders to erroneously define what leadership should look like rather than what it really is.  Now I know the truth of God's righteousness in me.  He's a lion and I'm ready to unlock the cage and set Him free.  In love and service wherever I'm needed.  I'm ready to not only lead, but to allow Christ to lead through me.  Not by the convictions of the people who think I'm 'not good enough' but by the conviction of God's character engrained into my being.  His character builds me up to want to lead, serve, and love more.  Not 'try' to sin less. If obedience is 'tried' then we are making it about ourselves, not Him in us.  THAT is radical belief.

So go out, make disciples.  Love others, serve Him.  You don't need an ordination from the State of wherever to be a Pastor.  You don't need a degree from such and such Christian college to hold credibility.  You are baptised in the Holy Spirit, THAT is your credibility. If you're called to Pastor, then go out and Pastor.  In conclusion, if someone responds to my calling with:  "Um, I think you need to work on yourself..."

I tell them this:

"Jacob cheated, Peter had a temper, Noah got drunk, Jonah ran from God, Paul committed murder, Gideon was insecure, Miriam gossiped, Martha worried, Thomas doubted, Sara was impatient, Elijah was moody, Moses stuttered, Zachhaeus was short, Abraham was old, and Lazarus was dead.  God doesn't choose the qualified, He qualifies the chosen."

NOBODY can tell you that you can't. Because we can do anything in Christ who strengthens us.  THAT is Great News. 

They Called Jesus a Heretic, too.

             I remember the first time I ever consciously did something 'bad'.  I was five years old, living in Ocean Springs, Mississippi.  Even then I had a vivid imagination as well as a unique ability to cause mischief with or without knowing it in the process.  Whatever I was pretending at that moment isn't necessarily important, but it did include a small baseball bat and my parents car parked in the garage.  This was nearly 25 years ago, so the most I can remember is taking a swing at the headlight several times before the crash made me jump out of my skin and run into the kitchen like a silly cartoon character.  My mother was there to greet me with a puzzled look on her face.  Then my eyes swelled up and I cracked under the pressure of my mom's confusion.  "I....I...I broke your car!!!"   This was it, I thought it was over for me and my mothers' disappointment would be insurmountable.  I don't remember much afterward, but I can imagine it went a little like this.

Mom- (If you haven't met my mother, she loves us kids unconditionally and found it incredibly difficult to be angry at a 5 year old, incredibly adorable me.....and it's still true today.) "Aww, sweetie.  Do you think that was good idea or a bad idea?"
Mini Grant- "Bad idea....."
Mom- "And we're going to try not to swing the baseball bat around breakable things anymore.  Okay?"
Mini Grant- "Okay mommy.  I'm sorry."
Mom- "It's okay. We'll get it fixed. Love you."
Mini Grant- "I love you, too."  I nodded in agreement.

Agreement.  That's what it came down to.  Because of my mother's love for me, an innocent 5 year old boy wearing suspenders and a mickey mouse shirt, she forgave me right away.  I agreed with her, because she was kind enough to express that forgiveness, that I shouldn't make a particularly stupid decisions with baseball bats.  All of this agreement, love, grace, understanding, and nurturing wouldn't have been possible without the idea of the what triggered it all.  My confession.  "Mom....I broke your car with the baseball bat."  Too bad parents aren't to forgiving these days.  Now they just call them A.D.H.D for merely acting like children, dope them up on 'attention deficit' medications, and make them act like zombies.  Another blog, another time.

Back to the point.  Two blogs ago I briefly spoke of confession.  I quote myself: "Confession doesn't mean to cast doubt on yourself, but to cast everything you are, good or bad, into the sight of something perfect."  I wrote this well over a month ago and now the idea of confession sticks out to me again.  A wonderful, hard working mentor of mine, Paul Donnan, recently gave a sermon regarding True Confessions.  Paul Donnan, in case you don't know him, is bold.  He's smart.  He's unafraid, a true Apostle spreading the message of the actual good news.  Not the man made, legalistic ideals that many congregations have added to their 'ways' over the last 2000 years.

"Confession to be forgiven seems right, but it's a work of the flesh.  As if Jesus wasn't completely finished...."

And my favorite quote of the whole entire sermon.....

 "Confession to be forgiven is an extra-Biblical church tradition.  Nowhere in the New Covenant do you find a believer confessing their sin to be or maintain forgiveness.  It's not in there."

Bold.  And true.  Before any of the Pharisee Freds start screaming 'heresy!', allow me to use an example from Paul's sermon and a couple illustrations of my own to explain wonderful phenomenon called Confession and Forgiveness.  What it meant back then, and what it means now.  Prepare for contextual clarification.  Your mind will be blown.....

Pastor Paul reminds us of Christ hanging on a tree with two men.  One on each side.  First one will challenge Him.  "If you're as powerful as you say you are, then free us from this tree...."  Then the other says something to the other criminal.  Paraphrased..."Don't you fear God?  We deserve this punishment because what we did.  This man is innocent."  Then he says to Jesus, "Remember me, Lord!  In your Kingdom!"  To me, this guy didn't even expect to get to heaven.  He didn't expect salvation.  He didn't expect the way Jesus would respond.  He didn't even confess to Jesus, He confessed to the other guy.

"Today....you will be with me in Paradise."

Woah.  Keep this in mind as well, a few moments before this took place I do recall the Lord had also stated, "Forgive them Father, for they do not know what they do..."  Interesting.  He asked the Father to forgive them as they were STILL mocking Him.  Nobody had confessed.  Nobody had recited 'the Lord's prayer to salvation' (which is also NOT found in the Bible, but I'll touch on that later.  Keep reading.) and He was STILL forgiving.  This is Love.  Do we see the light, yet?

Let's look at some parables and New Convenant stories:
The Adulteress in the Gospel of John - No Confession.  He asked, "Where are the ones that persecute them?  Now go and sin no more."
The Prodigal son - There was a confession, but you would notice right away that the Father in the parable never asked for it.  He never asked his son to confess.  In fact, the Father's heart was filled with compassion when the son was still far away.  When the prodigal son says, "I'm sorry..." the father was too busy telling his servants to start throwing a party to even listen to his son's confession.
Even the lost sheep in Luke 15 it says that even if one were to go astray, the Shephard will search that sheep out.  Do you really believe that the sheep will have to ask for forgiveness before the Shephard puts it over His shoulders and takes it back to the other sheep?  Don't you think He's busy rejoicing that He found you?  This is love.

I like this one. You have a child learning to ride a bike.  They promise you that they're ready to do it on their own and they won't fall.  You let go and let them independently pedal as far as they can.  Then they fall over.  As a parent, what do you do?  Do you run over right away for the sake of the child's safety and security?  Or do you wait for them to confess and say that they are sorry they fell off the bike even though they promised they wouldn't?

Many congregations don't even realize the true context of the word 'confession'.  Confession, as written in the original Greek writings, was  'Homologio'.  Literally, this means 'to profess the same thing as another.'  

....to agree.  

 Let's go through 'Confession' in the New Testament.

Luke 12:8-9 "Everyone who confesses (agrees) me before men, so The Son of man shall confess (agree)...."

Romans 10:9-10 "If you confess (agree) with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart....you shall be saved."  (Nothing about sin.)

1 Timothy 6:12 "Timothy made the good confession (Agreement with the Holy Spirit) in the presence of many witnesses..."

Romans 14:11 "Every tongue will confess (agree) that Jesus Christ is Lord."

James 5:16 "Confess (agree) your faults to one another."

Acts 19:18-19 "Many of those who had believed kept coming, confessing (agreeing on), and disclosing their evil practices."

NONE of these verses say anything about sin, but everything about the identity of God.  Except for one....

1 John 1:8-10  "And if we confess (agree) our sins, God is just to forgive us."

     1 John is an amazing book.  It's also one of the most mysterious.  There is a lot of debate as to who this book is addressed to.  This is the tricky thing about the Bible.  It's written to many different types of people.  Not just believers.  Many scholars would say the first two chapters of 1 John were written to a Gnostic church developing in Asia.  The more I learn about the Gnostic belief system, the less mysterious 1 John becomes. Chapter 2 opens with "My children..."  Why would John call gnostics 'children'?  Well, I'm pretty sure even today an atheists unbelief isn't powerful enough to exempt him from being a child of God.  God is faithful to that which He created.  Despite who anybody is, or what anybody is, the Breath of God is in their creation, not just the 'nice people' that go to church every Sunday.  We are all Children of God.  John knew it, too.  What a loving guy.

We can also justify this by the opening of the chapter when John states, (v3, 4) "...and which we have seen and heard declare we to you, that ye ALSO may have fellowship with the Father and His son Jesus Christ; and these things we write to you so that your joy may be full.." (Young's literal translation)  And then in 1 John 2:20 it's directed back to believers when it says, "but you who have the anointing of the Holy One..."  Dig deeper into what the early Gnostics believed then read 1 John.  It will definitely make a difference in 1 John.

We could also reiterate the meaning of the word sin in 1 John 1:9 as well as a verse in James that's been brought to the attention of this blogger.  James 5:19-20 encourages Christians to retrieve turned away *sinning* Christians and to save their souls.  Paul even considers himself 'chief of sinners'.  So can a Christian still have 'sin' in their life or can't they?  Depends on the context of the word 'sin' in the particular verse.

I could go through all of the definitions of sin, (9 Hebrew/6 Greek translations and definitions) and the context of each one, but this blog is long enough.  I can save that subject for another blog, as well.  Until then, whether aimed at Gnostics or believers, the context of sin in 1 John 1:9 is translated to 'missing the mark'.  To me, that translates to 'not living to your potential in who you are in Christ.  Christ in you can do greater things than this'.  Which, if I was told that by a church leader, I would feel encouraged.  I would be in 'agreement' with God that I'm better then this.  There's no condemnation in that verse.  No implication of Confession, so I return to the point.  Confession is not necessary for salvation.  It's just not in there. 

Then we can bring the Lord's Prayer into this.  "Forgive us our sin as we forgive those who sinned against us." This is also an incorrect context of the verse.  The original greek translation, (Not the King James version, which was modified for the purpose of controlling society back in the day) says 'forgive us our DEBTS as we forgive our DEBTORS.'  Once again, nothing regarding sin.  Debt was translated from the greek term 'opheile' which mean "That which is owed..."  Nothing concerning salvation, or confession.

  Dear reader, please don't get me twisted.  I love confession.  Confession is a GOOD THING.  We should confess (or agree) with God on what He says about us.  We are justified (Romans 5:1),   So the Grace of God is poured out in the truth of what He says, not what the legalistic church community says.  It's not about how 'bad' I am, it's about how good God is in me.  When the Holy Spirit convicts, He convicts you not of your sin which was taken care of 2000 years ago, but your identity of righteousness living in you.  Christ in you.

Last but not least....I'm going to share my feelings with "The Prayer to Salvation."  I'm sorry, but this has always left a bad taste in my mouth.  Even since I was a 15 year old kid on his knees in a Baptist church in Wiggins, Ms reciting it for the first time.  Thank GOD for feeding me the meet of the actual Gospel.  I always wondered why, when Jesus told Peter "Follow Me!" he never said, "But first tell me everything you've done wrong and then we can go..."

  The prayer of salvation is legalistic crap developed by Billy Graham in the 50's and it needs serious modification.  I've NEVER led someone in the Lord's prayer because it never felt correct.  I use to be ashamed, but because of the knowledge I've gained by careful study, I'm glad.  When someone is told to pray this prayer, they are left with a curse that opens up the potential to second guess themselves.  "What if I wasn't sincere?" or "What if I was never saved?"  It opens a door of control between the leader and the led.  It's manipulative and it's mind control.

  We are to confess (agree) that Jesus is Lord, to believe what He did for us in our hearts, then we will be saved.  Then we are commanded to Love our God with our whole heart, mind, and soul.  Avoiding sin, or bad decisions, or mischief, or missing the mark, or whatever you want to call it, is a natural reaction to that belief, that love, and that understanding of the cross.  Knowing that IT IS FINISHED, and there's no to do list to maintain your salvation.  Metanoia (repentance) will occur as a result of your love for God.  It is FINSHED really means, it is finished. 

Anyway....I'm going to go build a snowman.  PEACE!